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Writer's pictureDorsa Sajedi

CineHaiku: Editing Complete & Foley

ROLES:

Mia: Performing/Directing

Dorsa: Producer/Editor

Alyssa: Cinematographer

Abbie: Sound Recordist/Mixer


So since I did my last post I’ve been working on the edit trying to experiment with what we had. In terms of the forest shots, we ended up only sticking to a one-shot for the first section, being a tracking shot of Persephone’s hand going up into the air towards the trees (suggestive of her relationship with nature as the Greek goddess of Spring). The third section is also, as planned, a one-shot, because we all understood the power that came with the shot straight away when we filmed it! (Alyssa, our cinematographer, should be very proud -- and also Mia, for enduring the freezing cold water/weather).


The second/middle section was the biggest challenge. There were several shots we had for this (which I will summarise and include screenshots of, forgive the colouring, I haven't graded yet and for some reason in the export the contrast has gone up in some of the shots):


Pomegranate ‘tear’ 1: More fake blood, CU, pomegranate tearing apart.

Perse tearing the pom: Wide, tearing pomegranate, fake blood dripping all over dress.

Pomegranate ‘tear’ 2: Less fake blood, ECU, a lot more feeling/squishing, and also some natural sunlight.


Perse finding the pom: Picks up pomegranate, comes into shot and holds it, wide (very disney princess-esque, like snow-white with the poisonous apple)


I began by creating a sequence specifically for the pomegranate tear close up shots as I felt both had their golden moments at times and not-so-great moments at others, so this helped me figure out which bits had the most potential for the edit. In terms of the wide where the blood drips all over her dress, I found that the bits where her face was obscured by the pomegranate being positioned in front of her, was a lot more powerful, as her facial expressions aren’t really what I thought the focus should be on -- essentially I felt it was more impactful for there to be more attention on the mass amounts of blood dripping down her arms and onto the white dress. Because of this, I was left with three clips that were very ‘jumpy’. To account for this, but also as a way of building up enough tension for the beautiful third section of Persephone in the water, I opted for a back-and-forth method, where the shots intercut each other, ending on the shot of the biggest pomegranate split. I thought this tear was visually impactful right before the third section, and I hope that the sound will emphasise this too!


Following this cut that I sent off for the picture viewings, here is a summarised note of the feedback we received:


FIRST SHOT

  • LEO: cut a few seconds earlier before the hand goes

  • ZOE + JULIET: fade to white through exposure increase? [will have to do this in davinci?]


BACK AND FORTH:

  • ZOE: too much, keep it simple, rip pom, go to other shot, stay there longer, then go into the thumb

  • LEO: cut from first shot to close ups, tease audience with the pom shots, cut to the wide shot, first shot of blood dripping down arms should be at the end


FINAL SHOT:

  • Straighten horizon line


Leo has a good eye, because I definitely did not notice the fact that the third shot was ever-so-slightly not straight, so I got onto fixing that straight away. Following up from this feedback, I got rid of a few of the clips (no less than 2 shots I think) to reduce the back-and-forth within the second section as it was a little too much for 30 seconds I believe. I will attach both versions below for comparison.


Initial Picture Lock

Post-Feedback Picture Lock [less back-and-forth]


So that’s the final cut decided on then! At the time I’m writing this, it’s a few days after we booked the foley room to record some sound that we might potentially use in the sound edit, which of course isn’t ideal as I should’ve had the final cut done before this, but I was lucky that the general gist of what the edit was going to be was already there, just less back-and-forth, so in this scenario it wasn’t much of a problem, but for future reference I know to have it done before any of it is given to sound. But now, it's all done, and the AAF has been sent off to Abbie for the sound design, I can’t wait to see how it turns out!


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